Misery

Misery loves company which is why I never want to leave her alone. Do I wish for extreme events just so I can feel something… because I feel numb most of the time… everyone tells me this is all there is to life… but there must be more… should there not be? New clothes give you happiness for 30 minutes, max a day… where do buy the every lasting happiness… money does not buy happiness, nothing else does as well… so is it just a concept that you are supposed to chase until you realise that all of this is just a flickering light… whatever brightness you can get take it… read a book or thread a needle… or… or do whatever… until the light extinguishes… some days it seems like you are waiting for it… so that you do not have to do just do something… or keep wishing for extreme events just so you can feel something…